Medical Mistatements Medical Mistatements - The Funny Short Jokes Of The Day "Medical Mistatements". Joke of the day is a clean, funny joke posted each morning for your enjoyment! Medical Mistatements

The following statements were found on patient's charts during a recent review of medical records. These statements were written by various health care professionals including (we're afraid) a doctor or two at several major hospitals:

• "The lab test indicated abnormal lover function."


• "The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut, and handed to the pediatrician, who breathed and cried immediately."


• "Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized."


• "The skin was moist and dry."


• "The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch."


• "She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until 1989 when she got a divorce."


• "The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed."


• "I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy."


• "The patient lives at home with his mother, father, and pet turtle, who is presently enrolled in day care three times a week."


• "Bleeding started in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los Angeles."


• "Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation."


• "She is numb from her toes down."


• "Exam of genitalia was completely negative except for the right foot."


• "While in the emergency room, she was examined, X-rated and sent home. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as stockbroker instead."


• "Coming from Detroit, this man has no children."


• "When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room."


• "Examination reveals a well-developed male lying in bed with his family in no distress."